Faith, Family, & Focaccia

A faith and culture Mommy blog, because real life gets all mixed together like that.

Poem: A Mother’s Longing

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The longing swells
like a beautiful ache,
too much
and not enough,
like words
that tumble over each other rushing to be heard,
to claim a vibrant, humming space
inside each breathless moment.
A longing
for his childhood
to never end,
or at least not yet,
not soon.
Not with the dragging weight
of self-conscious awareness
to steal his effortless presence in each moment,
Not with the need to fit himself to others’ expectations.
Not with the maturing steadiness
I know he needs to find
just
not yet.
A longing also,
guiltily,
for the energy
inside these slipping,
sliding,
urgent moments
to be here
with him
with joy.
To hold the space I know he needs
when I am already so over-stretched
and strained
from the need to fit myself to others’ expectations.
But,
most of all,
this longing that expands,
demands,
this swelling space inside,
is for the world –
somehow
to make a space for him
(and,
perhaps,
as well for me).
To open its heart wide enough.
To receive this precious gift
of his excitement
and imagination
and utterly original
Life.

Author: Serena Gideon Rice

In early 2011 my family moved our home, temporarily, from New Jersey to Milan, Italy. In the process I quit what had been my dream job conducting policy-directed social science research, to focus on my other dream job, raising our two young children. The three-year adventure was exciting, exhausting, disorienting, fulfilling, and countless other contradictions. It also birthed in me a desire to share my reflections on life's joys and challenges with anyone who cares to reflect with me. Now that we have returned to the US I'm finding that the new perspective I gained in Europe has come with me, and gives me a whole new way of interacting with my home. There's still so much to learn and share! I hope you'll share the journey, and add your own lessons to my daily education.

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